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A moongate in my wall: собрание стихотворений
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[1960s]

610. Лазарь Кельберин (1907–1975). «Когда пятнистая луна…»

At times when the spotted moon with torn and ragged clouds is strewn; at times when in the city stream the isle of dead its last does dream, and every leaf on every tree is full of spring impurity, — then, hiding in the twilight thick, a man will make his step more quick, and hasten from that road and past where crosses come to life and stare, and on one's breath a shadow cast from rocky height that rise up there… — There by the cemetery wall, you stood with me, — do you recall? And fresher than a mountain stream the April kiss to us did seem.

20 May [1930s]

611. Дмитрий Кленовский (1893–1976). Ангелу-хранителю [272]

From my childhood, you were always near me— in a woman's tender first embrace, in the floor that bore my infant footsteps, in the first warm sunlight on my face. After that, you always walked beside me, gave me Paris in the month of May, Andalusian gardens, Roman sunrise, — speaking Russian all along my way. Then, I thought — not knowing you were with me — that it was myself I used to hear; there was too much noise and too much gladness drowning out all else in my young ear. It is only now, when all is quiet, that I have been able to divine finally, the voice — in all the stillness — which I long ago mistook for mine. Now I know: if ever I was worthy in this life, from very early youth; if at any time my earthly falsehood had in any way resembled truth; if I kissed a woman without wounding, felt a flower, and it never died, — it was all because you leaned to touch me, all because you never left my side. And of all the things you did, the wisest was that all day long till night would fall you were always able to protect me from myself, most dangerous of all.

272

From the collection Прикосновенье, Munich, 1959.

March 1960

612. Дмитрий

Кленовский (1893–1976). В лесу [273]

Hot as a bonfire is the summer noon, but in this wood relief awaits you still, the morning freshness will not leave it soon, and it is all suffused with early chill. Stay for a while. Sit in the nut-grove bower upon this hidden moss-grown stump, and hear, while drinking in the languor of the hour, the wondrous tale unfolding for your ear. A leaf is wafted to the mossy ground; fragrant, the little mushrooms upward reach; a sigh, a rustle, whisperings… the sound, insatiable, of creation's speech.

273

From the collection Навстречу небу, Frankfurt-on-Maine, 1952.

28 Feb. 1961

613. Дмитрий Кленовский (1893–1976). Всевышнему [274]

By the starry sky and my own soul You proclaim that You indeed exist. As an infant blind from the beginning, never having known his mother's face, yet remembers whispering and singing, hands caressing tenderly and bringing gentle warmth and never-ending grace, so do I, not having ever seen You, know You, feel Your breath from where I stand, hear Your song, Your whisper understand, and against all human earthly reason recognize the warmth that is Your hand.

274

From the collection След жизни, Frankfurt-on-Maine, 1950.

13 Mar. 1961

614. Дмитрий Кленовский (1893–1976). Наш мир [275]

Of course, it's fair! Not in the present the end of which it cannot see and not in that which it bewails or does not have the strength to be. But in the changing succession of suddenly bedazzled days, its gift of momentary gladness the transient kindness of its ways. So all around us, and forever: under a dagger's constant aim people will kiss and gather flowers and build their houses just the same. In spite of all the grief of partings, of all the hands wrung in despair, of all premeditated falsehood, it still will be forever fair!

275

From the collection Разрозненная тайна, Munich, 1965. Variant in the first line of the first stanza in the manuscript: «Oh, yes, it's good! Not in the present.»

17 July 1965

615. Дмитрий Кленовский (1893–1976). Звезды [276]

Children are taught in textbooks that stars are so far away — I somehow never believed them, those things they used to say. I used to love as a child to stay awake in bed: and stars would ever so lightly rain tinkling round my head. From the blackened boughs of chestnuts I would shake them down to the sand, and, filling my pockets with them, could buy the wealth of the land. Since then I've been mean and stingy, — oh heart! — but, forsaking youth, I never forgot, growing older, my childhood's merry truth. We live low down on the ground and the sky is so far, and yet — I know that the stars are near us and can be easily met.

276

From the collection Навстречу небу, Frankfurt-on-Maine, 1952.

15 June 1967

616. Дмитрий

Кленовский (1893–1976). «Вот стоишь, такая родная…» [277]

In your plain little coat and kerchief, so familiar and dear, you stand, the key to our promised heaven you hold in your empty hand. Let's set out once again together! The hills ever darker grow. Does it matter that we are tired? We've so little left to go. If only we're never parted in the lonely course of our fate, if we only have strength together to reach the Highest Gate! Once again, let us bless each other as we used to, and never fear — they will let us enter together, that's long been decided, dear.

277

From the collection След жизни, Frankfurt-on-Maine, 1950.

July 1967

617. Дмитрий Кленовский (1893–1976). «Легкокрылым гением ведомы…» [278]

Guided by some lightly winging spirit far beyond the sea the birds have flown. On this dark and bleak November morning, why do you and I stay home alone? Maybe we should follow — take a knapsack, staff and flask, some good and trusted books, and pursue the swiftly flying swallows over woods and meadowlands and brooks? Only those who linger are un able to partake of joys on Earth arrayed. Every turnpike, boundary and barrier we would pass, unseen and unafraid. Surely then, at break of day tomorrow you and I would reach the rosy haze over gleaming rocks and crested breakers, slender palms, and golden blessed days! And as surely, to the fullest measure, we who dared would be repaid indeed for the grain of utter faith within us, for that single mustard seed!

278

From the collection След жизни, Frankfurt-on-Maine, 1950.

[1960s]

618. Дмитрий Кленовский (1893–1976). Царскосельские стихи [279]

When I was a boy I used to be your friend, beautiful town of parks and lonely statues, dense lilac groves and empty palaces, — you hadn't yet been visited by grief. Your Gumileff was still a carefree youth, Akhmatova — a schoolgirl and in love, and Innokenti Annensky had not died suffocating at your railroad station; even your Pushkin used to seem to me not dead, but living, not yet grown up, but just another of my noisy classmates. Decades have passed. Impossible to count your losses. All your palaces now lie decaying. All your poets have been killed by silence, bullet, or complete contempt. Alone the name of Pushkin, as of old, still shines above you like a glorious promise — a token of the coming future truth.

279

First part of a poem from the collection ,Неуловимый спутник, Frankfurt-on-Maine, 1956

[1960s]

619. Дмитрий Кленовский (1893–1976). «Как много есть прекрасного на свете…» [280]

There s such a wealth of beauty in the world: a maiden’s breast, a flying eagle's wing, loaf of a maple, sunrise in Rialto, a lily-of-the-valley in the spring; a leaping doe; the Milky Way, a sail, the Volga's great expanse, a child's eyes… You see yourself: too many things to mention for you and me to count or to surmise. And yet is life not easier for knowing that everywhere around you children roam, and maples grow, and there are waves, and maidens, or simply someone's garden and a home? You say to me: All that is transient, passing! But you are wrong! Next spring, in that green bower, another doe will leap again, as lightly, and underfoot will bloom another flower! Our world is ill. It whispers invocations and tries to smother what in life is true. But nowhere in it stands a ruined building where grass will not come up anew.

280

From the collection Прикосновенье, Munich, 1959 Variant in the first line of the last stanza: «Our world is sick. It whispers invocations».

[1960s]

620. Дмитрий Кленовский (1893–1976). «He камешком в мозаиках Равенны…» [281]

No pebble in ravenna's sculptured tomb, nor crimson paint-dab in the Vatican, — I merely was a wisp of merry spume upon the ocean's blue and distant span. But when a sail came toward me, I would swirl to meet it; I have played with reefs near land, caressed the body of a sun-tanned girl, and, tired, dug into the golden sand. My fleeting course no great event did jar; for one chance moment was my fate unfurled, yet I was happier and richer far than all the tombs and castles of the world.

281

From the collection Прикосновенье, Munich, 1959.

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